"I'll strangle you and fuck you up the rectum, How gay is that? That's right, I've got 7 inches!"...spoken to John, Bartender at Liquor Lyles by The boy I served
last night who is never coming back.
Who the hell was that guy? I'll have to ask Rick, our regular mich golden draft lite and red-headed slut at Liquor Lyles. He was about 5'9'' with neck tattoos and some on his chest, which I found out when he took off his shirt in preparation to fight at about 2 minutes to 2 am on the bar clock. I was sitting at the bar, smoking ban lifted and coffee, sweet and boozy in my hand. Guess I shouldn't have told him to get out of the place, told him there was no bet cause he had no money, told him he obviously didn't get enough pussy after he told me to go get some:
"Butch, grow some hair!"
And despite the 911 I had dialed into my phone with right hand ready to hit "send," I was biting my left baby finger in order to keep from laughing because after all, he did 88 months.... in Iowa.
So, that was the perfect ending to a slow night at work and sweet April picked me up and made sure I got home safe and sound and today I think I'll pick up that mase and holster, special ordered froom the army surplus store downtown, and maybe I'll work on clearing up the confusion that seems to result every time I'm really fucking happy... It's not to say that happiness doesn't confuse me equally as much as it confuses those around me but for whatever reason people either hate the confrontation that that is presented by those who are truly happy, or assume that there must be foul play at hand... possibly heavy drug use. Sorry folks, hate to disappoint. I'm just really fucking happy.
Can I say happy again? HAPPY.
[That said, I neither condone or condem recreational or spiritual drug use. Basically, it's up to you...just read the warning label first.]
Posted by jackie colburn at October 24, 2005 11:11 AM